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Showing posts with label steps. Show all posts
Showing posts with label steps. Show all posts

Friday, 21 December 2012

How to Conquer your Fear of Public Speaking with these 5 Simple Steps

Top 5 Tips to Conquer your Fear of Public Speaking

Does public speaking scare you? Did you know that in a famous poll which asked "what is your no.1 fear?" That the second most common answer was death. What was the top answer? What could be more scary than death...?

That answer was public speaking. So here are five great tips to beat your fear of making speeches,giving presentations or whatever form of public speaking awaits you.

Plan, Plan, Plan, Plan

The old saying is still true - fail to plan then plan to fail... The key to delivering a successful speech is to know your material, write about what interests you and speak about something you are passionate about - for some it's much easier to talk about cars then finance. Always plan out what is appropriate for your audience, if it's something with a lot of data or numbers - then it may be more appropriate to include a variety of print outs whereas a meeting about cars could have a slide show on a projector with a variety of cars you will talk about. Sometimes you don't get to choose what you get to talk about and so you just have to find your own personal way to discuss the topic that has a personal touch, something that makes it unique.

Learn Your Material
You will find it amazingly easier to deliver a speech that you know what your talking about and that you have rehearsed, rather then one that you finished writing and printing the night before. Preparation is essentially the key to doing well in a speech and you will find that over preparing will never hurt.

The Delivery
Okay, so your standing in front of a crowd and it doesn't matter how big that crowd is, you may be feeling like your heart is beating at 150 miles an hour. Everything is moving so fast, and you hear your name called to start your speech. You feel queasy inside and as you open your mouth to say a word, you feel no moisture - just a dry mouth. This is what you will feel like most likely and don't worry, there are many other people who feel the exact same way when delivering a speech. This is how you may feel at the beginning but when you finish speaking you will feel completely different if you manage to keep the audience interested and maintain in control of yourself.

Do's and Do Not's

Do: Relax

Before you start, take a deep breath and just build yourself up. My favorite quote to say when I am in that position is to say, 'I can achieve whatever I believe'. Keep taking deep breaths whenever you need to, your audience will be thankful that you are pacing every now and then - it also gives them a chance to soak in the information. If you have the option, you can take a sip of water every now and then as a breather break.

Don't: Apologize for a Mistake
Don't apologize for a mistake. People most likely didn't notice it and stopping and saying, 'I'm sorry - that wasn't meant to be there' is more likely going to do more harm then good. Just continue on like you didn't even notice you made a mistake, it's the same concept when performing in a dance competition or a music recital - don't stop if you mess up - just continue and show you have the ability to adapt to any situation.

Do: Enthusiasm
Nobody likes a speech without enthusiasm and you will often find it may be difficult to speak up and project your voice but it will involve your audience and be worth it in the end.

Don't: Worry about Blushing/Embarrassment
Everyone hates speaking in a crowd (well mostly everyone - including me) and naturally some people will blush or get 'red faced'. The more you worry about it, the more people will take notice to it. If you focus your energy on engaging your listeners and forget about the blushing then it will fade as soon as it arrived and less people will care about it because you obviously don't seem to.

The Aftermath
You did it! You finished your speech and guess what? You're still alive and I am sure you even got a hand of applause when you finished. Feels good doesn't it? Well, you put in the hard work and survived - take a deep breath and acknowledge any complements with a quick thanks.

How to deal with Control Freaks in 5 Steps


5 Steps for Dealing with a Control Freak

How to Cope with Control Freaks


Control freaks don’t tend to make people around them happy. Okay, this is an understatement. Being in the constant orbit of a control freak can make you downright miserable.
Colleagues, friends, and partners can feel their every thought, action, and opinion is only valid if it concurs totally with the control freak’s take on things. We all need to feel we control some things to help us feel secure and safe; but the constant judging, micromanaging, interfering, bossiness, and manipulation of a dictatorial control freak goes way beyond this.
Feeling constantly judged, micromanaged, and manipulated eventually builds resentment, bitterness, and anxiety. The lack of tolerance or credit given for any initiative of our own makes us feel subjugated, like dejected subjects of some despotic ruler whose one role is to hear and obey. Remember that control freaks are “status junkies”. Anything they feel you say or do to undermine their own sense of inflated self won’t be tolerated, regardless of your thoughts and feelings.
And whether they intended to bully or not, the fallout is that people feel steamrollered and bullied.
So how can you best deal with a control freak?
Understand that yes, you are dealing with a control freak
No matter how intelligent, ingenious, and prone to being right your control freak is, despite all that or whether they are wonderfully helpful sometimes, you still have to deal with that controlling behavior, that tyrannical bit of them. Separate all the wonderful good they might be doing through their tremendous drive to get things done from the fact that you feel totally controlled by them.
We can make excuses for other people at the same time as they make us feel acutely bad. So right here and right now, whatever their “saving graces”, understand what you have to deal with by separating in your own mind the good stuff about them from this overbearing control.
Respect your own autonomy
We all need to feel a sense of independence and self-direction. Even if the control freak is your boss, don’t feel you have to automatically say yes to every little whim and demand.
A client of mine was amazed by the idea she could sometimes turn down her boss’s demand she do unpaid overtime after work. “Treat your boss’s unreasonable orders as if they were requests,” I suggested to her. Whenever he “ordered” her to work unpaid, she would tell him she’d get back to him about it after seeing whether it was possible. This started to alter “the game”. He began to appreciate she wasn’t a doormat.
Sometimes you have to force people into the situation of behaving decently rather than waiting until they “see the light”. If you don’t behave as if your own sense of autonomy is important, than neither will the dictator in your life.
Don’t always be “nice”
Control freaks don’t play by the rules of “niceness”. Helpfulness, a willingness to pull together and “not make waves”, is part of human nature. Many of us like to help if we can because we are “hard-wired” to. Human beings are social creatures and after all, we don’t want to hurt the control freak’s feelings.
But control freaks sometimes like to meet their match. They’ll respect people who have a will and mind of their own or even those who don’t overly care whether they are liked or respected by the CF. Control freaks are so hard to please that you might waste many lifetimes trying to please, placate, and pacify them only to inevitably fail. If someone is pathologically mean with their praise or consideration of your feelings and needs, then don’t treat them as if they are not like this.
Don’t argue; it won’t work
Don’t be too nice because control freaks don’t really work in the realms of “niceness” (as opposed to charm), but don’t get into long-winded arguments trying to justify your position, either. Control freaks are great at arguing why you and everyone else in the world should feel, think, do, and say just as they see fit. Just make your point once and keep coming back to it. If you don’t want to paint your bedroom wall the color they demand is best, then tell them so but don’t feel you have to justify your position. This “broken record technique” is hugely effective. Just state your position (“I want to paint my walls lime green!”) and repeat whatever they say. They’ll soon get bored.
Life’s too short
If you don’t have to have this person in your life, consider cutting them loose to go on their way dictating and steamrollering others. We risk becoming control freaks ourselves when we feel it’s our divine role to change them. We may help others to change by adjusting our own responses, but ultimately they are responsible for themselves.
Part of their journey to maturity needs to be a realization that other people are not just puppets to be bent to their will. This is how very small children may see the world, but a mature human being knows what they can and cannot influence and control.
Some control freaks really do want to change and they might need help. I am reminded of the cartoon in which a man tells his wife: “You know, my New Year’s resolution is to stop telling you what to do all the time and I’ve also written down what your New Year’s resolutions are going to be!”

Two Key Steps to Achieving your Goals

Two Steps to Failure-Free Goals

Guitar Player


We all have goals. We have that list which looks so crisp and pretty on January 1st. It may say “go on a vacation” or “lose 10 pounds” or “learn to play the piano”. But, by January 20th, that list is under a pile of papers and that goal is far from of your mind. Why is it that we can’t stick to these resolutions? We want to do these things but we just can’t get it done.
The reason is that our goals are vague. We want to get in shape. We want to be a positive person. But what does that mean?
In order for a goal to really stick it has to be both specific and challenging. We will often keep our ambitions unclear so there is no really measurable way to admit failure. If you want to “be more confident”, who’s to say if you’ve succeeded or not? There’s no way to measure the results so there is no way to say you haven’t met your aim.
A specific goal has details embedded in it and is clearly defined. You have pinpointed exactly what you want to do and you are working towards a certain result. If you want to get in shape, then have a specific weight goal. If you want to become more adventurous, then decide what it is you imagine an adventurous person does and do that; maybe adventurous to you means talking to strangers or it could mean skydiving. If you keep your goals unclear then you won’t have anything to work toward and you will have no idea if you are actually progressing towards a result.
Your goal must also be challenging. A “low goal” is one that not hard for you and will not ask you to exert yourself in any capacity. While these may come easier to you and you’ll feel more successful at the moment, the ultimate results will be sub par. Your self-esteem comes from moving out of your comfort zone and achieving despite the risk of failure.
These “challenging and specific” goals are ones that should exceed your immediate grasp; if you could achieve it today, then it’s not an appropriate goal. If you would like to learn to play the guitar, a “low goal” would be to buy music books and maybe learn a chord or two. While this is a great start, this goal has a high chance of immediate success and doesn’t push you out of your comfort zone. Instead, you should say you will learn three songs and will be performing a concert for family at Christmas. Now you have something challenging to shoot for and, when you’re sitting in the living room wowing everyone on Christmas Day, think of how proud you’ll be of yourself.

Thursday, 20 December 2012

How to Make Money In the Stock Market: 4 Steps to Make You a Confident Investor

It’s a whole new investing ball game folks. Even just a few years ago, your odds of being able to start investing with as little as £100 were as good as a pig not rolling in mud after a storm.
Sure, people have been writing about investing with £100 for years.
But the knowledge needed to pull it off properly was crazy. And the emotional and practical obstacles to getting started were scary.
Not anymore.
If you’ve always wanted to hit the start (or restart) button on investing, here’s how you can do it with £100.

Is This You?

Let’s be honest.
Most folks believe the investing myths that abound everywhere you turn. I’m talking myths like:
  1. Getting started with investing isn’t necessary if you eventually make enough money
  2. Investing with small amounts has no benefits
  3. You need thousands of dollars (or more) before the investment company gatekeepers will let you in
  4. People who don’t know a stock from a bond or how “The Market” works should stay away
  5. You should pay off all your debt – regardless of the terms and interest rate – before investing
  6. The best returns for a solopreneur or small business owner are always reinvesting in your business
There could actually be some truth to these myths in certain scenarios. I should know since I worked in the investment industry for a decade. But people who these myths apply to probably don’t look and act like you and me.


Every day, a new barrier to investing with small amounts is being invisibly broken down. So, if you’re determined to have your purchasing power grow faster than taxes and inflation constantly devour it, you should be investing now.

Know the Breakdown

Many people get stuck with investing because they feel they need to know the perfect investment before starting.
Here’s a secret everyone should know:
There is no such thing as a “perfect” investment. There are only suitable or appropriate investments, some of which you might already know about.
You could get tips from Warren Buffett all day long or even incredible education in less than two pages, but the fundamental process can be the same for everyone.
Here’s the breakdown to get you moving, educated, and joining a new generation of confident investors.
1. Answer Some Initial Considerations
You don’t need to know every investing definition, process, and principle before starting.
But you do need to know your investing goals up front. Beyond ensuring your purchasing power is keeping up with the hidden bite of taxes and inflation, do you need money to pay for higher education, retirement, a future wedding, a new car, or that vacation you richly deserve? Answering this question will determine the account structure you need to pursue these big goals.
You should also consider how much to invest initially and periodically, especially if you have debt or are self-employed. Do this based on more than just financial analysis though. The health, emotional, and mental angles are essential too.
2. Choose an Investment Account Type
You could open a limited partnership, futures, or foreign currency account (among others). However, the newly empowered investor probably will find them too complex, too expensive, and too risky.
Instead, base your selection on the answer to this core question:
Do you want to invest with a focus on retirement, higher education, or something else?
If retirement, pick among retirement options like an Individual Retirement Account (U.S.), Tax-Free Savings Account (Canada), or Individual Savings Account (U.K.). If higher education, choose among options like a 529 College Savings Plan (U.S.), Registered Education Savings Plan (Canada), or Junior Individual Savings Account (U.K.). If retirement or higher education doesn’t suit your needs, the plain vanilla account is a great option.
3. Select an Appropriate Investment
Remember there are no perfect investments for you, only suitable or appropriate ones. And among all the investment types under the sun, picking one between stocks, fixed-income (i.e. bonds), mutual funds or Exchange Traded Funds, Real Estate Investment Trusts (REIT), and commodities will generally be appropriate for most people.
Just make sure you first understand core investing principles like risk tolerance, diversification, liquidity, rate of return, and keeping costs low before making a choice.
Filters and screening tools can be your best friend here, so use them liberally.
4. Picking an Investment Company
It starts getting easier now because your choices of account structure and investment type aren’t offered by all investment companies.
Separate from each investment company’s online functionality, support methods, and pricing model, the core decision point will be how little money the company requires to open an account and invest in specific securities.
Consider signing up for automated periodic investments to further decrease the minimum balance amounts required if otherwise too high. Just about every country has investment companies with no minimum balance amounts for certain investments or minimum amounts as low as £100.
Tools at The Motley Fool, FindTheBest, Financial Highway (Canada), and Money.co.uk (U.K.) can be really helpful.

Boom! You’re Investing

After the account is opened and you’ve placed your first trade, you’re rocking and rolling as an investor. Your investment balance might be small-time, but you should feel big-time confidence that your money can now grow to pay for your future needs.
Plus, it feels awesome to fight back against the ever-present grip of taxes and inflation.
When you act on these steps, your mind and spirit will thank you for liberating your time, money, and talent. Your pocketbook and bank account will thank you too.
So what’s it going to be folks? Commit to getting started (or restarted) with investing and let us know when it’s happening in the comments!